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"I always fight with myself but they always leave me out of it."
"I hate you, you hate me. Too bad we're in the same body"
"Fuck you"
This is the page with poems that are pretty much about me. If you people think of asking "Tell me about yourself"
Don't. Just read my poems because they are the best insight in to me that there can be. I know that the name perfection seems
a little conceited, but the reasoning is this: I beleive that perfect doesn't exist, so perfect is flaud in itself. Perfection
however, if perfectly flaud, therefor perfect. And where as I am by no means perfect, because I am the best individual me
that I can be, I am perfection. And so is everyone else out there that is the best "me" they can be.
I could say I'm bored but I'm not
I could say I'm cold, but I'm hot
All this time I was depending on something that isn't there
The feeling of love was just thin air
No kmatter how many people, or where I'm at
I'm stick in my box, made of clear glass
Like a butterfly I attempt to get free
But in my purest form the world doesn't accept me
Violently fighting the feeling in my heart
Painfully hiding the tears threatening to pull me apart
The stress I go through makes my head spin
But happy or sad I cannot grin.
To run away from things gone wrong
I make, I write, I sing this poem of a song
So serine but so far away...
I was hoping I'd be happy by today.
Take a deep breath and dive right in
It can't be harder than everything else has been
Close your eyes and take the leap
I'll only find that which I seek
Release from this family that ties me down
Escape from these emotions making me drown
So honestly how bad can it be
Freedom for a teenager? C'mon, really!
But work and school, rent and bills
Does freedom live up to all the thrills?
I'm angry and I'm bitter
In relation to school some may call me a quitter
Why can't I stay at home
Why must I be left alone
Silently exiled from my family
The constant feeling they don't want me
I'm angry that I didn't have a childhood
I'm dejected that I can't have the life I should
It's so amazing to see
All of the fault has fallen upon me
It's my fault for my depression
My deficiency for my seclusion
But alas I'm jumping in to the abyss
My last hope and prayer is that I don't miss
I'm going to change my life that day
but I can't stay
Once upon a little while ago
I was walking down the street kinda slow
I noticed something out of corner of my eye
It was a treasure in a trashcan that I spy
Upon closer inspection
It came to my attention
This jewel, this treasure
Was capable of feeling pleasure
My surprise finding had turned out to be
A long lost thrown away part of me
She was angry, and she was sad
She was the part of me that actually got mad
She'd stick up for me and put up a fight
This treasure wouldn't let people abuse her every night
I don't know what had me outside that day
And I can't explain and I've no idea what to say
But I tell you this I'm happy as can be
Because I found this long lost part of me
I have no clue what had possessed me to throw me out
I wish I knew what it was about
But once upon a little while ago
I found myself while walking slow
It took me three years to finally find her
And the reasons I threw her out are still a blur
But let me suggest one minor thing
Keep yourself no matter what others are saying
Because that feeling of emptiness inside
Is not a loneliness that won't subside
If you're feeling empty or desolated
It's probably because it's yourself that you hated
I went to the stars
Then I came back
I was looking for the life
That I lack
I ran away
To be with you
You fucked me up
Who could have knew
Fuck you all
This is for me
I yelled at you
And your still couldn't see
I gave everyone my all
My sun and moon
But they hurt me again
None too soon
So I run again
Away to the sky
I take dry ground
And use it to get high
My love, your death
It's all the same
When I get back from the stars
I'll still be mamed
I don't wanna hurt but I want to cry
All this pain won't pass me by
Throw it all into work or into friends
Fuck, the shit around me never ends
So do I sleep or do I cry?
Screw the pain around me I don't want to try
Let them leave me be
I want to feel what everyone sees
I hurt and I feel so hard
"Baby I love you, never let down your gaurd"
I wish I could let it out so everyone could see
Exactly what emotion they've been evoking in me
This is my song, my poem, my mind..
If I shove it in your face, would it make you less blind?
For all the things gone wrong in my life
And all the people whom have stabbed me with an emotional knife
You've lost the fight
Because I can find comfort in my pain
I love and live off the acid rain
I have conquered you
When I'm in pain
Your's is worse than mine
You see, it won't be today, but you'll learn in time
.......I'm better than you.........
So many words come out of my head
And yet in my dreams I don't know what was said
I sat there trying to explain to you
What I didn't know was really true
I sit in my dreams yet again
Trying to decipher what happened back then.
Through the truth and the lies I've been trying to see
What happened to the inside that was so pretty
Dying again I have no where to go
Trying to determin what to keep and what to throw
I needed that person that I threw away
No one liked her but she was part of me.
I asked for you help but all along
It turns out you were wishing that I was gone
I was trying for you I wasn't thinking of me
You got your way there went part of life I can't see
Again and again I walk through the door
And every fucking time you still want more
I said I love you but really I lied
Five hundred days ago that part of me died
Trying again with no way to win
Attempting to understand makes my head spin.
The devils at night don't seem to go away
The pain inside me will always stay
So many will read this and they'll have no clue....
This whole time.... All I needed was
YOU
My room is my life and I love it here
I love my music that no one can hear
I don't remember my house it's not mine
I'm looking for love that I cannot find
My only family is my friends
When we're together the party never ends
Everything's gonna be OK I'm gonna be alright
One day I won't need to live at night
Through all the chaos inside
My strength will provide
The ability to pull through
No matter what you do
I'm not alright now
But I know that somehow
No matter what I'll be OK
If not now then another day
Keep in mind and take heed
One day... I WILL succeed
Push me over, kick me down
Laugh at my smile, Make me frown
Again I thought I could be happy
I was wrong again but I thought maybe
If I was smart I'd run the hell away from here
When I'm OK I won't feel this fear
It's hard to be strong
But I know I'll move on
I'm fighting this empty feeling inside
Again it's OK, I'll let it slide
Funny how I thought someone could make me OK
But everytime I try I have to pay
It's so cold when alone
My only warmth is my own
On I march through the cold desert wind
Forward I push... Alone once again.
I'm crying inside, but no one knows
I've almost died, but it doens't show
Maybe one day it would be smart
To show my pain and fall apart
They took a picture and said I was ugly
But these were the same people who said they love me
This desolation I'm drowning in
Makes it so I can't win
I've been working too hard and all for you
I've exaused my options there nothing left to do
I'd say I'm sorry and I would cry
But no matter how you beat me
I will not die.
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