Insobriety

~*Infatuation*~

Insobriety

Isn't it great? Everyone's been there at some point or another.

This is my diary of insobriety.

I hate these pill which keep me alive

I don't need them to live, BUT

Without them I would surely die

Look how I've resorted to you

Flip the top and pop the pill to start new

Round and round I quickly go

Where I stop, nobody knows

But as I fall asleep I'm taken away

I was here before, but not today

Gone again sirens ringing pain

I'm strapped to a board going insane

One more OD and you'll be locked up

You'd have to kill me first, now give me a cup

This is just one last crime

I won't survive it this time

I do it for the caffine

He does it for the high

I make a pretty picture

And pass the feelings by

I'm relaxed as can be

The music is loud and I don't hear

But it's ok because everything's going by me

Lost in my dream I have to find the thing

I won't wake up until I'm where I'm supposed to be

Relax some more and

Close the door

Everythings gonna be alright someday

And it's only because I'm making me OK

If I take that pill I'll be so happy

People think they know, but it's not me

He does it for the caffeine it's enough to cry...

I keep on doing it... souly for the high

I've got silent music in my head

It's played for me by the living dead

Singing silently, her hands on my waits, sitting on her knee...

They think I'm here sitting in my chair,

but I'm far away in my happy place

And you don't know how to get there,

That which is my happy place

I run again but it's OK

No one can find me where I play

Nausea is taking hold of me

Fear of this omnious rash is gripping me

Sickness of taking meds is setting in

I wish I could feel normal again

Time is ticking it's taking me away

15 weeks and one more day

Running from the future and fighting the past

One day I hope my happiness will last

But it's late agai nand early too

I'm wishing four hours ago I would have done what I was suppossed to

The approaching sleepless day of work

Is looking superiour to the usual, though I'll be playing in dirt

Maybe one day I'll have something better to do

Than sit for hours waiting for days to ensue

Something more than sleep mangled dreams

Wishing for what life was supposed to bring

Fighting time with my endless procrastination

Waiting and wishing for my salvation

Fluent addiction

Constant contradiction

What's with the over whelming power

Of all of these downers

Hours fly by and I'm still awake

This druggie stuff is a piece of cake

Incoherent as always

No need for appologies or sorries

Go to sleep

Or sit and steep

Fry your brain to a golden brown

Take the pills that bring you down

Take the pill

Bring a thrill

Make it unreal.

Does he know that I'm using him.... in a fit of rage

He doesn't know how short his page

In the back of my mind I wonder if he could care

But I don't so I ask myself why I want to go there.

I don't

I won't

He's screwed because I screwed him.

Seduced him at the wave of a flighty whim

How's it feel, men of the world

To be with-held by a drugged up girl

Does he care... does he even see?

In a fit of rage I captured his interest to occupie me

Oh Lord, what will she do next...

When this awsome princess is rolling on X