Here's my farewell

But you may never tell

Indeed it's your fault for this

I might not leave if not for your shit

Your disreguard and inconsideration

Is a dusgrace to this goverment and our nation

But revenge will be mine

You'll lose money and save time

So fuck you I'm getting a GED

I can't beleice you disrespected me

14 credits shor that I DID

Don't think I can't stop you because I'm a 'kid'

Stupid fuckers, don't pout....

 

 

You guys are the best teachers I've ever had

Nice, caring, and understanding when I'm mad.

I know sometimes I've neglected my studies

And I admit sometimes it was just to hang with my buddies

But with all that I'm going through, it's hard to take

Sometimes I really just need a break.

I will remember all of you for years to come

Though my life has just begun

All of your efforts are appreciated beyond belief

And I can't tell you how much it's a relief

Finally I have people that I can confide in

Because sometimes life is so over-whelming I can't even grin

I'm sorry that I'm not the best student that a student can be

But I'd like to thank you all for being the first to see

 

Sometimes it's hard, just to be me.

 

 

 

I wasnt lithium, I want more and more

Got to smoke that crack, behind closed locked doors

 

Got to make me bleed,

Make me, more ugly

 

Come and save me please?

Kill and break my ease

 

How much will it take?

How much must I break?

How much longer must I cry

How many times must I die?

 

You're just doing your job, I'm just being me

What's more importand I guess we'll see...

...BUT...

I swear if I had a knife

And just one damn night

This time I would succeed

I'd take my FUCKING LIFE!

    Then reality set in. So much self confidence, shattered at the "Ewww" of one rather unattractive boy"

They all

Come and go

And when I

Sit around

I cry

 

Guess no one knew

What any of them

Could do

 

So they play around

And everyday they

Bring me down

 

Sometimes I do lie

No one knows

That I die

 

I smile and

Say that I'm fine

When they pass I laugh

And drink some wine

 

But today

Only now

Seems so grey

 

I know all too well

How to deal with this mess

I've gotten so used to this

I don't even feel depressed

When alone

 

Sitting on my piece

Of grass

Everyone thinks I sat

On my ass

 

I didn't sit by

And watch all this happen

To me

I hold on tight

And when it slips I greive

 

So slowly my life

Slips away

Farther it goes

Day by day

 

I watch it go

And wave goodbye

I can do nothing more

They make me die

Everyone is looking, but no one can see.

All you're interested in is judging me

But how do you judge pain?

How do you hate the hopelessly insane?

When I cry, I see nothing from thee.

It's pretty sad, I don't even get fake pitty

Can you see those at the end of the rope?

The ones with no where to go and with no hope

Yes? No? Maybe? No?

I say this lovingly,

But I guess none of you can see me!

 

No where to go and nothing to lose

Only my heart you can truely bruise

 

So when I sit crying on my bed...

I ask you. "if I was a movie, would it make you SAD?

Try to heal

See that girl in the hall

Stay away lest you may fall

She's a freak

Yet you call her geek

Look and stare

Wondering what happened there

You don't understand the pain

You think the pain I have is normal and plain

But you don't see, and you don't bleed

You don't cut words in your for others to see

You stay away

You run and play

You fret and scurry away from me

These people you see, They all fit in

They all alike, the same of kin

But when I come out

And walk about

You run away and

Don't let me play.

And you hate me

Crazy psycho looking

Sooo pretty

Having some fun, with no friends

But no matter what, the pain never ends

You don't see, you don't feel

You don't understand that I can't eat my meal

Going through pain that you don't know

But because of you the pain'll continue to grow

Taking these drugs to take the pain away

Friends say there's no much pain I'll want it everyday

Getting so mad I wanna die

But because I look preppy, and smile

People think I lie

Thinking of all that I been through

Ask yourself "Why do I hurt you?"

Crying and screaming because it's unfair

Waiting and hurtinb ecause no on'e sthere

Breaking things and butting myself

Wanting you to kill myself

Crying and screaming

Dazed and day-dreaming

Going insane from so much pain

You do these things to me

And wonder why I've become a demented being

Look at me

Look in my eyes

You don't know what

Behind them lies...

Now I'm beating the crap out of you

Remembering all the shit you put me through

Then I put a gun to my head

Killing myself for the things that you said.

You take the gun from my cold dead hand

Kill yourself and that's the end

What if I was the same as you?

Wouldn't that make life so blue?

But the way you talk and the way you are is a part of life too

Some people can hurt

Some people can bleed

Those people aren't you

Those people are me

See if you could cry and REALLY bleed

You'd cae enough to be nice to me

Them that are special are those that are weird

You scream and stray when we come near

So no one knows and no one cares

No one looks beyond skin hairs

I'll be the same as you for just one day

If you take all my pain in the same way

A fair trade. Maybe? NOT

Because of my pain I love a whole lot

Please understand And please leave me

Please let me be the person you can't be

Yeah I do too

 

But do you have a reason to go boo hoo hoo?

 

Well I need to cry,

And all these nights I lie with eyes dry

It hurts and kills me,

Inside I die

 

So the next time a tear falls from your face

And you go on how you don't wanna cry

Or be in this place

REMEMBER

I would give anything for your WET face.